If you were Heather today, it went something like this...show up at the eye doctor's office. Tell the nice desk person who you are and what you're there for (an annual appointment--right as rain), and have them squint at a book of tiny handwritten printed names...and ask for your name again....and peer at the book, and finally say, well, no matter, that may have been you right there erased...go take a seat.
eye dr: (handshake and then reading the chart) you were last here in march last year. i told you to come every six months. it's important. the eyes are like windows, we must take care.
heather: (once a year does me fine in the US) uh, yes..
eye dr: you're wearing contacts...(back to chart, frowning)...you only wear these only 8 hours a day?
heather: actually, no, i wear these (putting box on table) for a month at a time.
eye dr: (multi-tasking by peering with some magnifying thingy into my eye) no, no, I told you last time. (break from multi-tasking for direct lecture in German) You must not wear them more than 8 hours a day.
heather: but they're made to be worn always.
eye dr: (loud sigh.) I told you once, I tell you again...(then I get the same as previously, a second time in German, then in English also for good measure--except for words unknown in English, like 'oxygen', are kept in German) You cannot get these from a place that sells glasses, only an eye dr can say...if it gets to the point where the glasses seller can say don't wear, then it's too late, your eyes are damaged for good.
These 'all the time ones' (finally looking at the box)--they are for old people or small children, people who cannot put in contacts well (somebody better inform the Ciba marketing team)...and people like that need to come to an eye dr every month (oh really).
heather: (well actually, they came from plus.de not the glasses seller, and the whole point is not to have to take them out every night) um, yes...
eye dr: (grudgingly) but if you are going to wear contacts, these are better than most. more oxygen to the eye, less dirt--but you must not more than 8 hours wear! 8!
heather: yes...clear..windows...8
eye dr: come back on Monday to dilate the pupil. then i see if my measurements just taken are correct. and don't wear contacts the day before. or until one day after that is done or else your contacts will turn yellow. and your world will be yellow, and a yellow world is not good. (handshake)
-->Well, a yellow world seemed to work a while back for Bono, as I recall...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
I might have trouble not punching an eye doctor like that.
They really don't like you getting contacts from an "Optiker" or online, although sometimes they actually seem to know more than doctors. My first contacts were prescribed by a doctor and they were just horrible. I eventually stopped wearing them. The ones I got from a store worked much better for me...Funny reading your story, but must have been very frustrating for you.
He sounds sort of like Dr Quack.
I have multiple docs that I must see more often than anyone should have to see any doctors. I have concluded that all doctors (eye doc included) in Germany will simply not like me, for *I* am the Goddess of the my own health and will always find new ways to "disobey" or "argue". And I freakin' HATE seeing docs more often than there's no valid reason to, so I too get the "you were supposed to see me every x months, not wait this long!" thing. Argh.
Post a Comment